Just the other day I took my 9 month old Doberman puppy, Donner the Devil Dog, for a walk in the park. After peeing on every tree within sight for a half a mile (the dog, not me) we stumbled upon two very attractive young ladies who had a two-year-old 130 pound male Rottweiller.
There seemed to be some chemistry between me and the girls (who were sisters) and the Rottweiller and Donner seemed to be getting along, too.
The sisters explained that Zane, the Rottweiller, hadn’t had much exercise lately. Donner was pretty excited to have another dog to play with, so the girls suggested that we let them run loose and play. Donner loves to run and play with other dogs and has never been aggressive towards other dogs, so it seemed like a good idea.
The dogs were well behaved and ran around and played. Zane had the weight advantage since he weighed about double what Donner weighs, so Donner got knocked down once. But Donner definitely had the speed and agility advantage, and Zane couldn’t keep up.
After only a few minutes, the Rott plopped down all out of breath and tired. Donner was still ready to go and was leaping over Zane trying to get him to play. But Zane couldn’t go any more.
Now both of these dogs still have all their “equipment”, if you know what I mean, so testosterone came into play.
I guess the Rott decided that he wanted to be the dominant dog, and started to mount Donner, the Devil Dog. It only took a second for the Rott to realize that he made a big mistake.
Donner unleashed on him a fury like I’ve never seen! My 70 pound baby had this 130 pound bulky Rott backing up and fighting for his life. If I hadn’t pulled my dog off the Rott, I’m thoroughly convinced that Donner would have cleaned his clock.
When I did get my dog pulled off, the Rott went under a picnic table and plopped down on his side, totally worn out. My devil dog was jumping all over the place still wanting a piece of the Rott!
What does this have to do with bodybuilding? Well after thinking about this whole incident, I realized that over the past few years I had transformed from a Doberman into a Rottweiller.
I had used the old, “I’m bulking up” excuse for so long that my eating habits had gotten sloppy.
Sure, I had reached an all time high body weight of 190. I had 17″ arms and 16 1/2 ” calves on a very light-boned 5’6″ frame. I was the biggest I had ever been.
But I also had a 34″ waist…OK, maybe 34 1/2″. Well, OK…more like 35″.
A little over a month ago, I realized that I was just too damn fat. I hadn’t seen my abs in years.
I was tired of being a “bulk boy” that looked big in clothing but was afraid to take my shirt off at the beach.
It’s Time To Get The Doberman Look!
Dobermans are beautiful dogs. Sleek, powerful, muscular, defined, elegant creatures. When they walk and run you can see the muscles rippling. They walk elegantly and proudly with an air of confidence.
Rottweillers (am I spelling that right?) are also powerful dogs. But they’re stocky and saggy. They walk like the bulldog in the Bugs Bunny cartoons. You can almost feel the ground shake as their paws slam down on the ground. They remind me of big bulky powerlifters.
And that’s not a bad thing either. If you want to be a “bulk boy” have at it! It’s a great excuse to “consume mass quantities”, as the Coneheads would say.
I’ve noticed that as I’m making the transition from Rottweiller to Doberman, I’m starting to get a lot of compliments. People at the gym are saying my calves and thighs are getting bigger.
No, actually they’re getting smaller. Smaller because of less fat. Now they’re getting defined and therefore look bigger.
I’ve discovered that the only person who was keeping track of my measurements and weight was me. It doesn’t matter that my arm is smaller now. It looks bigger cuz it ain’t covered with so much blubber!
Measurements don’t matter…it’s how you look. A well-defined 15″ arm looks better than a bulky, blubbery 17″ arm.