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Old 03-14-2012, 11:12 AM  
bruteforce
bruteforce
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Default Real Men Are Big


vs.


Seriously. Which of the two males do you think would have a better chance of surviving in
1) A post-apocalyptic wasteland
2) A bar fight
3) Prison
4) A mugging
5) A trip to grandma's where you forgot to pack snacks

This is not to say that men have to be fat, but the current obsession with waif thin males is getting under my skin. This is mostly an unorganized rant, so here are a few other observations.

Grandmothers want their daughters to marry big, strong men. The younger girls don't understand hardship the way the older generation does. A big, strong man can provide for his family even if an office closes down. He can hunt, protect, and has enough fat on him to give up his own food so his wife and children don't have to go hungry.

I see the same thing with a lot of the Cambodian/Laotian/Thai girls I know. They want a man that can ride a tiger into battle against raiders.

Blacksmithing is pretty damn manly.

Its usually the skinny wimps that think they want anarchy, but only if there are rules imposed on us big guys so we don't take their food and their women.

Pizza is not a vegetable. That's why there is a salad bar. If you can't eat a pizza and a salad, you aren't trying hard enough.

Intelligence is more than just "book-learnin" but if you can't read and somehow made it through high school, there's a problem. Real men need to be able to solve problems quickly and communicate well. You can't do that without the ability to read and write.

The willingness to sacrifice for our families makes us men, not impregnating various women and wearing hats with the price tag still on them while talking about how "hard" you are whilst working at Taco Bell.

Tattoos are pretty cool, but they don't make you a man.

Pull up your pants. Its difficult to fight ninjas riding in on polar bears if your pants keep falling off.

Drinking, smoking, and swearing are fine, but NEVER in front of children.

Learn to cook. Grilling steaks is about as manly as it gets, but be handy with other forms as well. With the savings from not eating at restaurants, you can more easily afford to send your kids to a good school.

Love your family. Nothing is weaker than a man who will not show love to his family.

Hate and love go hand in hand. We hate anything that would cause our families harm. Don't let it get out of hand though, use it to conquer the issue quickly and then let it go.

Moar bacon.
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