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Old 04-29-2010, 05:16 PM   #31
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You're telling me you honestly can't comprehend the relevance for understanding and compassion in an activity that is not only physically gruelling but mentally and emotionally taxing at every turn as well?

Beyond that, the result of advice given with lack of compassion: Those who need understanding and compassion will not listen. Which makes callous advice totally useless to anyone who actually needs the advice. What good is giving advice when it's generally ignored because it's given with a rude, inconsiderate, I-don't-give-a-crap-about-your-feelings tone?

Moreover, the very reason that people are failing to overcome these obstacles is becasue of the mental and emotional side of the activity. Addressing these needs far outweighs the, "shut up and lift moron," type of advice.

I am saving the compassion for those who need it. Your comments, on the other hand, seem to be withholding it from everyone whether they need it or not.
Your suggestion that people fail to overcome obstacles in their life because of their own mental fragility further illustrates my point. This is an activity that takes mental determination and hard work, much like anything in life. Those that stick with it are the ones that earn my respect (regardless of weight on the bar). I do not have time in my life to have compassion for people who do not have the strength within to overcome obstacles. I have my own obstacles in life to deal with, and you can be sure as **** that I am not going to sit here complaining about them on the internet when I should be focusing on what I can do to overcome them. There are certainy people in this world that I have compassion for, but someone on the internet complaining he is a hardgainer is certainly not high on the list, unless he/she was born with a genetic disorder / is missing part of their digestive system / has no money for food, etc.
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Old 04-29-2010, 05:58 PM   #32
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I just cannot and will not buy into dirty bulking for anyone really. *Except as I've stated before, you are really young and/or a powerlifter.

But I still love ya Steve!
I wasn't talking about dirty bulking Rick so not really sure where you're coming from. I recommended beef, cheese and milk
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:03 PM   #33
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i dirty bulk but im part of that young crowd he mentioned
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:15 PM   #34
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Originally Posted by ehubbard View Post
Your suggestion that people fail to overcome obstacles in their life because of their own mental fragility further illustrates my point. This is an activity that takes mental determination and hard work, much like anything in life. Those that stick with it are the ones that earn my respect (regardless of weight on the bar). I do not have time in my life to have compassion for people who do not have the strength within to overcome obstacles. I have my own obstacles in life to deal with, and you can be sure as **** that I am not going to sit here complaining about them on the internet when I should be focusing on what I can do to overcome them. There are certainy people in this world that I have compassion for, but someone on the internet complaining he is a hardgainer is certainly not high on the list, unless he/she was born with a genetic disorder / is missing part of their digestive system / has no money for food, etc.
Take the guy who doubled his bench in a year, eating like a horse, and still only has a 39 inch chest at 6'2" - an increase of...oh..yeah...he lost chest size. Used to be 40"? Then, let's say, for the sake of argument, he comes on a forum and says, "I'm a hardgainer. I've pushed up my strength, I've pushed up my eating. I haven't gained size. Help!"

The responses that he seems to get as often as not are, "You're an idiot and a whiner. Just eat more girly-man! Shut up an just do it!" (Yeah...I know I'm exaggerating a bit...but that's the basic tone that comes across as often as not).

How is that helpful?

Sure, he may be making mistakes. He may be humbled enough to actually learn. But responses and attitudes like that are not going to help him.

I'm simply calling for a bit more understanding in some of these comments. How does it hurt to say, "Hey dude, I feel for you. That's rough. How much are you eating? What types of food? What is your lifting like?" Then give appropriate, civil answers instead of these broad muscle-head type answers that are more likely to drive said people away?

There is SO much misinformation out there from what seems like legitimate sources (like almost every magazine and most the books) that for someone to not understand how to really gain weight is not a stretch. Someone can be a very determined, hard worker but just simply not have the knowledge yet for success. I feel for these people. I've been there. It's extremely difficult to put so much into it and get so little out and not know why. When I and those like me come for advice we don't need derision. We are asking for understanding of our attitudes and problems. We need someone who is empathetic and gets it and can help us to move past whatever block we're facing. "Suck it up and just do it" is not useful.

And someone with a total lack of any sort of empathy because they haven't faced that particular challenge is, as I said, offensive. If someone really doesn't understand being a true hardgainer because they haven't been there (both physically and emotionally) then they should pretty much just keep silent on the matter - and if they do have the inclination to suggest a thought, it should be given with care and reserve rather than abrasive contempt.
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:17 PM   #35
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I wasn't talking about dirty bulking Rick so not really sure where you're coming from. I recommended beef, cheese and milk
I'll give you the beef and even some milk...but cheese? That's pretty dirty in the grand scheme of things. Quickest way I know to 'dirty' up food is to dump a bunch of cheese on it.
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:18 PM   #36
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Eating dirty is just lazy and not wanting to put the effort into it that it takes to bulk semi-clean.
Too many calories from grains isn't healthy either. Not trying to pick a fight so I say this with respect but I don't know anyone who eats clean all the time.
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:24 PM   #37
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I'll give you the beef and even some milk...but cheese? That's pretty dirty in the grand scheme of things. Quickest way I know to 'dirty' up food is to dump a bunch of cheese on it.
I live in Wisconsin. I just told the cows what you said. Be careful if you ever come here.
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:29 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by folkprophet View Post
Take the guy who doubled his bench in a year, eating like a horse, and still only has a 39 inch chest at 6'2" - an increase of...oh..yeah...he lost chest size. Used to be 40"? Then, let's say, for the sake of argument, he comes on a forum and says, "I'm a hardgainer. I've pushed up my strength, I've pushed up my eating. I haven't gained size. Help!"

The responses that he seems to get as often as not are, "You're an idiot and a whiner. Just eat more girly-man! Shut up an just do it!" (Yeah...I know I'm exaggerating a bit...but that's the basic tone that comes across as often as not).

How is that helpful?

Sure, he may be making mistakes. He may be humbled enough to actually learn. But responses and attitudes like that are not going to help him.

I'm simply calling for a bit more understanding in some of these comments. How does it hurt to say, "Hey dude, I feel for you. That's rough. How much are you eating? What types of food? What is your lifting like?" Then give appropriate, civil answers instead of these broad muscle-head type answers that are more likely to drive said people away?

There is SO much misinformation out there from what seems like legitimate sources (like almost every magazine and most the books) that for someone to not understand how to really gain weight is not a stretch. Someone can be a very determined, hard worker but just simply not have the knowledge yet for success. I feel for these people. I've been there. It's extremely difficult to put so much into it and get so little out and not know why. When I and those like me come for advice we don't need derision. We are asking for understanding of our attitudes and problems. We need someone who is empathetic and gets it and can help us to move past whatever block we're facing. "Suck it up and just do it" is not useful.

And someone with a total lack of any sort of empathy because they haven't faced that particular challenge is, as I said, offensive. If someone really doesn't understand being a true hardgainer because they haven't been there (both physically and emotionally) then they should pretty much just keep silent on the matter - and if they do have the inclination to suggest a thought, it should be given with care and reserve rather than abrasive contempt.
i like your point
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:37 PM   #39
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I'll give you the beef and even some milk...but cheese? That's pretty dirty in the grand scheme of things. Quickest way I know to 'dirty' up food is to dump a bunch of cheese on it.
? Cheese is dirty?
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Old 04-29-2010, 06:41 PM   #40
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? Cheese is dirty?
Only if it's dirty STD secretion like squeeze cheese...
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