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Old 10-27-2011, 08:00 AM   #1
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Just started a new job last summer. Over the past 3 months there have been several parties ( birthdays, Halloween, general social events ). I'm on-board with socializing but the food options are always horrendous and I do not eat. I am VERY critical of my diet and will not eat what is available. Ran into the same problem with my last employer where I was labeled a food “freak” & anti-social for 10 years. The thing is, I am in my late 40’s and in much better physical shape ( IMO ) then 99% of the folks ribbing me. And they’re at least 10-15 years younger than I am! Smokers, chronic soda drinkers, and fast-food advocates.

I eat hard, work hard, & play hard.

How can I politely explain to people or excuse myself from these functions without looking like a snob or anti-social?

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Old 10-27-2011, 08:16 AM   #2
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When I was younger, I used to socialize with co-workers. I did all the parties and hit happy hour. I learned a lot of hard lessons. One of them, for me, is that work is work. Friend and Co-worker rarely mix well, long term, for a variety of reasons.

So, I never do any social events with my co-workers. If there is a birthday celebration at work, I come into the room, wish the person well, but I don't eat the cake, ice cream, or whatever else.

It took a year of me talking my eating habits and why I don't eat certain foods (mostly junk food) and I think my co-workers got the point. For my birthday, there was not 2000 calorie celebration. They all just signed a nice card for me.

So, what I think I am trying to say is, what you do is simply explain that you don't do parties and don't eat the food usually found at them and why. One of my favorite explanations is "I only eat the foods that promote me looking and feeling like I want to look and feel."

It's not being anti-social. Expecting you to partake (once they understand your dieting restrictions) would be the same thing as expecting non-smokers or alcoholics to hang out with you in smoky dive bars.
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Old 10-27-2011, 08:34 AM   #3
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This might sound bad but I pull the food allergies card.
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Old 10-27-2011, 08:38 AM   #4
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They'll always label you as an extremist when you don't feel like slamming 3 pieces of cake. This always happens to me too. The thing is, if you aren't obese then they'll think your nuts if you still want to eat healthy. From what I've learned, you can't be honest with them either, because it will always become personal to them.

"No, I don't want cake, because I don't want to be a fat ass who stares at a flight of stairs with a look of terror. But it sure seems to be working well for you! So. . .have fun with that."

At least, that's what I WANT to say.

Last year at the Christmas party I had a big problem. We had it at Golden Corral, which is a buffet place. The party was during the day, and I was using IF at the time, so I wasn't supposed to eat yet. Turns out, you aren't allowed to go into Golden Corral if you aren't going to eat. My boss had to convince the manager to let me in, and it barely happened.

Of course, it turned into a much bigger thing than I wanted it to, and I spent the rest of the party explaining to people exactly what I was doing and why I wasn't eating. I had a lovely time reassuring all the fatties that I was still going to eat, I was just going to do it later on.

All I ever hear is "Oh I could never do that!" I know you couldn't. That's why you're fat and I'm awesome.

Did I mention that this is a touchy subject for me? lol
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Old 10-27-2011, 08:43 AM   #5
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I partake and if necessary cut back elsewhere later in the day.

I don't want to look back through life when i'm an old(er) man and think I skipped out on getting involved with my friends/co-workers/family all because God forbid I'd eat 500 calories over maintenance one day.
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Old 10-27-2011, 09:02 AM   #6
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Personally, I will eat junk food at functions if I feel like it and say no if I don't feel like it. I eat clean most of the time these days so I no longer feel guilty for eating cake or having a beer. I used to eat nothing but crap and drink 5-6 days a week so my current diet is much better than before but would probably cause those who are very strict with their diet to recoil in horror

As Faz said, life is too short to be counting calories on the rare occasions you go overboard. That said, people who are very health conscious have every right to tell others to get lost if they get hassle over not joining in and eating food they consider to be exceedingly unhealthy.

Exercise your freewill ladies and gentlemen
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Old 10-27-2011, 09:08 AM   #7
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When I am at social functions I try to focus on low/no carb foods. This is easy in Wisconsin of course, as most functions revolve around hamburgers, sausage and cheese.
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Old 10-27-2011, 09:22 AM   #8
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The thing is, I don't like sweets. I don't want cake and pie. I never crave sweets at all unless I'm going low carb and even then it's rare. If I really wanted it that badly then I'd certainly have it, but I'm also not eating something I don't really want that badly anyways just to avoid the questions, especially when it's crappy food.
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Old 10-27-2011, 09:53 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fazc View Post
I partake and if necessary cut back elsewhere later in the day.

I don't want to look back through life when i'm an old(er) man and think I skipped out on getting involved with my friends/co-workers/family all because God forbid I'd eat 500 calories over maintenance one day.
EXACTLY! Post of the day.
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Old 10-27-2011, 10:23 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Soldier View Post
They'll always label you as an extremist...

From what I've learned, you can't be honest with them either, because it will always become personal to them.
Nailed it!

Quote:
Originally Posted by *MC* View Post
"I only eat the foods that promote me looking and feeling like I want to look and feel."
I'm borrowing this line. Nice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fazc View Post
I don't want to look back through life when i'm an old(er) man and think I skipped out on getting involved with my friends/co-workers/family all because God forbid I'd eat 500 calories over maintenance one day.
It’s not a matter of calorie counting on my part. Hell, I could stand to put a few extra pounds on. I genuinely do not like the food choices. Wonder what reaction I would get if I supplied food that I eat? Protein shakes, whole milk, butter, tuna ( right from the can ), whole grain bread, and eggs by the dozen? I’m a very social person and do enjoy hanging out with my family/friends/co-workers, just hate the “why-don’t-you-eat-this“ pressures.

Somehow I do feel that most of these people would like to come over to my side. Just don’t have the discipline.
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