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BendtheBar 04-28-2013 12:32 AM

Viking Supremacy – By Hammer of Thunor
Viking Supremacy – By Hammer of Thunor | The Hall of Manly Excellence


I want to get back to the fundamental question when it comes to supremacy: do you do anything interesting in your life or are you content to do nothing much other than displace space? This is an arrogant movement and a stratifying movement. This isn’t meant to bring people closer together, but to drive them apart and grade them according to their awesomeness.

I’m calling those men who commit themselves to a life of intensity…Vikings. Vikings were the nastiest, baddest and freest men to ever walk/row the Earth. They spread awesomeness, mayhem, destruction and their seed everywhere within reach of their longships, and they never even asked permission first! Even their afterlife was a vision of manly excess, with every day in Valhalla starting off with an epic melee in full battle dress, and ending with an all night drunken bender and hot serving wenches. If you’re going to aim yourself at all you might as well aim high, so I’m not going for pirates or samurai or cowboys…it’s fucking Vikings!

DO – Be fearless. Live large and with confidence, truly owning the space you occupy. Vikings didn’t worry about whether they were right or wrong, and neither should you. If you’re right you’re right, and if you’re wrong you’re right. You don’t have to give a shit what’s going on within in the brains of every little whining fuck you come across. Stand up tall, do what you want to do and forget the rest.

DO – Have real opinions that matter, and say them out loud. Your favorite phone app for finding a fucking Starbucks is not an opinion that matters.

DO – Leave your house. You sure as fuck aren’t gonna kick ass and take names from inside of a sheetrock prison cell.

DO – Make friends, make enemies. You need a crew, a gang, a band of nasties to go around with and make trouble. You also need people you hate and want to choke on sight, because rivalry brings out the best in men.

DO – Lift weights. Get bigger; get stronger; get bigger and stronger. Feeling awesome is easier and more natural when you actually ARE awesome, and being weak and pathetic is most definitely not awesome. Be the beast.

DO – Get jacked on adrenaline. Live an “up” lifestyle and do things that keep your brain in go-mode. Thrive on stress. Drive yourself hard and make lemonade out of so many lemons. R&R is for bitch mode pussies…and women. Be 100% focused, 100% of every waking minute. A Viking Supremacist is always ready to go all in when the moment calls for it, and his body chemistry reflects that. You can have all the rest and relaxation anyone could ever dream of after you’re dead, unless you get called up to the big leagues in Valhalla and the party rocks on. Burn twice as bright for half as long.

DO – Have fun. The whole goddamn point of being a kickass Viking type motherfucker who isn’t to be trifled with is so nobody can stop you from having the shitloads of fun you know damn well you deserve. Now if you’re a rotten angry sonofabitch, be a happy angry rotten sonofabitch. Laughter is the best medicine, so if you aren’t the type to laugh WITH people, you might as well laugh AT them.

DO - Arm yourself and train for melees. People who live massively and awesomely attract lots of attention, and often that attention is not admiration. Envy and spite are your new traveling companions, so you need to be 100% prepared to show what a Viking is all about and kick the living shit out of the people who test you.

DO – Push the limit. You don’t know what you’re really capable of unless you’ve gone to your absolute edge. Did someone tell you a story about trying something and failing? Fuck him. He’s not you and he probably sucks and doesn’t have the resolve that a VIKING has like you do. People who live out lives of failure like to go around warning people not to do shit because they want you to suck as badly as they do. Laugh at these people.

DO – Talk massive shit. Don’t let pathetic weakness happen around you without commentary. Weakness is a condition that spreads like a virus when people are silent and polite. Be the medicine.

DO – Listen to 80s music and watch 80s movies. The 80s was the kickass decade because everybody was living out loud and going balls deep into everything and everyone. You need to saturate your brain with sounds that inspire action and beastliness, so absorb that culture, draw in all of its raw energy and then turn it out onto all the boring little shits who inhabit this lesser decade.

DO – Level up. Learn as many skills as you can that don’t just involve pushing buttons. You aren’t saving princesses, killing terrorists, or conquering intergalactic forces of doom…you are sitting in a fucking chair and staring at a rectangle. Get the fuck up and learn how to do something.

DO – Indulge your whim. Moderation is for faggots. You can’t be a candle that burns bright by only taking little tiny puffs of oxygen at a time. Burn ALL the oxygen as fast as you can get it and be too goddamn bright for mortals to even look at comfortably. Stop living the eternal life and health fantasy, realize you are perishable, and go out of the world burning instead of rotting. Which brings me to the next point…

DO – Up The Dosage. There’s one feature common to all men of the modern world who have any semblance of the prior glory of more interesting times: they UP THE fucking DOSAGE. Augment your body with all the exogenous chemicals that are designed to max out your beast mode and turn you into a walking tidal wave. Being average sucks. Being awesome for being average also sucks. Be more awesome than nature intended. Fuck nature! Fuck her good and hard.

RGRthat 04-28-2013 12:51 AM

What type of psuedo-roid rage BS is this. Though there are some good points like have an opinion, leave the house, stop playing computer games, and arm yourself (I love my 2nd ammendment) what the hell is this person thinking. It sounds like the ranting of a beefy skin head who thinks he's so awesome that no one can handle it when in reality no one can deal with his stupidity.

Off Road 04-28-2013 12:54 AM

Glad I'm not alone in thinking that was total crap.

BendtheBar 04-28-2013 01:57 AM

I actually pulled it off of Rippetoe's Facebook page and thought I would share it for your viewing pleasure.

bruteforce 04-28-2013 02:08 AM

My pleasures have been viewed. Some of it was T-Nation-esque, some of it was flat out hilarious. I found myself nodding a few times too.

BigJosh 04-28-2013 02:09 AM

Maybe I am a dumbass knuckle dragger but I thought that to do list was badass.

big_swede 04-28-2013 07:04 AM


DO – Listen to 80s music and watch 80s movies. The 80s was the kickass decade because everybody was living out loud and going balls deep into everything and everyone. You need to saturate your brain with sounds that inspire action and beastliness, so absorb that culture, draw in all of its raw energy and then turn it out onto all the boring little shits who inhabit this lesser decade.



Some good points he makes. I enjoyed the reading. Thanks for posting chief.

Tannhauser 04-28-2013 07:35 AM

I'll add the following to the original list:

DO indulge your inherent tendency to be as selfish as when you were fourteen, but dress it up like it's some sort of virtue.

DO distance yourself from the more painful aspects of reality, by making believe you are starring in your own heavy metal video, with dry ice and swords n shit.

DO continually tell yourself that you are actually a fierce independent Viking, preferably while working as corporate wage-slave, lining the pockets of an elite who don't know you exist and wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.

DO stick with the comfortable viking cliche familiar from grade Z films, cartoons and comics, without troubling yourself with a more complex picture of Viking life that was as much about farming, colonising, trading and dealing with poverty and land pressure.

DO identify with the Vikings, as opposed to any of the scores of other ferocious dark-age/medieval warriors (such as the Alans, Visigoths, Vandals, Magyars, Jutes, Franks, Ostrogoths, Bulgars, Huns, Lombards etc etc) in order to show the boundless depths of your originality.

DO go on and on and on and on about being manly, and banging chicks and not being a goddam faggot, to such an extent that even the least analytical person realises there's something going on.

DO show your commitment to the intense berserker lifestyle by throwing yourself in front of a combine harvester, thereby sparing everyone else from your yawnsome adolescent bullshit.

bamazav 04-28-2013 08:28 AM

If we are going to compare ancient menaces/cultures, I would argue for either Alexander and his gang or Genghis Khan and his bunch. Vikings were just wannabe.

My 2 cents.

SaxonViolence 04-28-2013 09:32 AM

It seemed up and down and all over the place to me.

True, False, Irrelevant and WTF? All randomly scrambled together.

My views on what's wrong with Modern Day Culture, indeed, the views of anyone who's invested much thought in the subject, would necessarily be too complex to express briefly.

Only a chucklehead would try to sum up his Life Philosophy so briefly.

Look at The Bible.

Even God had trouble summing it up in a few words.

Saxon Violence

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