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Old 01-10-2013, 03:47 AM   #6
Davis
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: USA
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I'm only 19 so I don't know too much about people's ways of thinking in the past...or even now too much for that matter. However, I see a lot of things I don't understand.

In the lifting world, we have thousands of motivational pictures, videos, and mantras. Why? Motivation is good, but it seems as if some people thrive on these things to do a simple task as going to the gym and lifting a little more than they did yesterday. A person shouldn't need motivation, but passion for something.

I see kids my age all the time put on their "status updates" about success. They talk about how to be successful etc. These are the same kids who have either dropped out of school or aren't doing too well. Maybe not all of them, but many of them.

Then, there are motivational speakers who probably fuel these things. The idea of "if you want to do it, then you can". That is true. You CAN do anything, but that doesn't mean you will. I guess it would be better to say that one may. I MAY deadlift 1,000 pounds one day if I really wanted to, but there are several elite lifters much closer than I am who just can simply not get there even though they're giving it all. There are several factors that success often relies on that some people just don't have. One of them is luck. (Honestly, the only reason Kesha is where she is, is because of luck.) All of that said, I don't believe there is not any use to try to do something at the highest level of one's aspiration. I want(ed) to be a world famous classical concert pianist, but that is a goal that nearly all odds are against me. That of course doesn't mean I can't get to a very high level and be a successful working musician. The main point of this paragraph is that all too often these motivational speakers(professional or just someone giving a speech) tell you that you can because you simply want to, and that you can work for it. Sadly, that's not true.

But then you have parents who have "the most talented son/daughter". Everyone's kid is the best basketball player, musician, etc. of their age in their area. Kids start believing this. They hear it enough, they begin to believe it because whether or not they want to admit it, their parents are wiser and know more than they do- so it must be true. It happened to me. I've seen it to others all around me.
Example of myself: My parents used to brag about me not having any "formal" music lessons and being self taught. They would talk about how wonderful I was. Others also thought I was wonderful. Guess what happened when I got into the real world? (Actually having professional music lessons) My heart was shattered. I believed I was awesome. Now, my parents didn't know better, and neither did I. Now, after busting my ass as I always did(Only this time under guidance) I sound pretty good to the "trained ear".

I heard a friend brag on another girl(her mom bragged as well) in the same manner. She sings. No professional lessons- just self taught. They all think she's wonderful. A lot of kids her age think she is wonderful. She's ok. She can sing most of the pitches she needs to, but overall, her singing needs a lot of work. Though, more than likely, she'll never get that because everyone tells her she is wonderful. Her parents don't know, and she doesn't... No one who knows her, has told her. What does all of this lead to?

Well, the sense of entitlement mentioned earlier. Everyone is told how great they are. They're told they're great athletes, musicians, brilliant minds, etc. They're told this all through their teens, and then they get a bit of reality and it just doesn't make sense to them. Which, if you're constantly told you are great- what happens? 1. You begin to let it go to your head. 2. You quit working on improving.

I've seen it happen with high school athletes. Maybe they used to practice on their own in middle school and were pretty good. Maybe they did some in high school, and got pretty good. Everyone is sure they're going to a Division 1 school. They have the stature, the genetics, but in the end, lack the skill. Often because they weren't doing what they needed to do on their own anymore. And from these same athletes who now play or did play at a small school with a poor team, it hasn't been uncommon to see them talk about how hard they are working now....(And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with playing at a small school, just so anyone knows.)

On a smaller note(since this post is long enough), it mentions Facebook. I believe it is very likely the idea of "status updates" have helped increase narcissism by making people believe others actually care what they're doing throughout the day or what they have to say. Case in point, if you call most people you are "friends" with on those websites and tell them about how you had eggs for breakfast, bought some new tires, and whatever else you did throughout the day, most of them will not care and wish you hadn't wasted their time. Although, with people able to share their actions and thoughts and no one actually say much negative about it, I can see how it would eventually lead to an idea that what you have to say or do is in fact important.


Cliff notes: People are told and believe how awesome they are and are either in for a reality check or quit trying and then get a their reality checks. People don't understand what it can actually take to achieve some goals, however motivational speeches may persuade them to think it is as easy as simply wanting it. Facebook may lead to some sense of self entitlement.
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