Training this weekend?
(by Brooks Kubik)
SPECIAL BULLETIN TO ALL DINOSAURS:
1. The weekend is here.
2. Weekends are for training.
3. All dinosaurs reading this have orders to grab the bar and kill as much iron as possible this weekend.
4. This is a global campaign waged by a multi-national strike force of barbell-bending, dumbbell-tossing, sandbag-heaving, keg-throwing, rock-carrying, log-hauling, heavy poundage, iron-slinging, "never say never" dinosaur commandos.
5. You are to join your fellow dinosaurs in having the best, hardest, most demanding workout of your life.
6. Doom on dweebsters...doom on slow-mo bunny rabbits...doom on pumpers...doom on shapers...doom on pretty boys...doom on academic know-it-alls and armchair theorizers...and above all, doom on the Exercise Police. TAKE NO PRISONERS!
Form follows function.