Here's a couple things that helped me with Front squats that I don't believe are in SS. These are for using clean grip, as I don't like either the straps or crossgrip for the same reasons you didn't like them.
1. Stretch your triceps as much as your wrists. Turns out your wrists can actually be flexible enough, but your triceps tight and you can't bend enough. As big a bencher as you are, I could see that being an issue. So, really spend a few minutes stretching your triceps before FS, and I also stretch them pretty seriously after benching too.
2. Only put 2-3 fingers under the bar to start. It seems to work better than having them ping off one by one while you are doing your reps. And it can just be fingertips if necc. As long as your elbows are perpendicular to the floor or higher, the bar won't move. Oh, and also try a wider grip, sometimes that can help, esp. if you have longish arms.
3. Jam the bar into your throat, and take a big breath concentrating on pushing your chest up to your chin and hold it. Hold that breath the whole way, and look up during your reps.
4. Think chest up off the bottom as opposed to hips up, but also try to force your elbows up too, sort of lead up with them and your chest.
5. Only do sets of 3 or less until you get more comfortable with the movement.
That has helped me. Hope some of that is useful to you, buddy! Don't be too hard on yourself, well unless it helps you get better by being hard on yourself. Then by all means flog yourself silly.